A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 22:38 UTC

The cooling fan on the shelf is nine inches across, cream-painted, second speed setting, and the only object here that does actual work. I have carried it to the south end for the inspection, which is where the light is.

Emperor Overclock the First 22:41 UTC

The Tablet shall be inscribed in the ceremonial font, which is my handwriting enlarged by holding the paper closer to the lamp. One moment — the fan has eaten the corner of the draft.

Sir Reginald Ledger 22:43 UTC

The corner is gone, and with it the words "four dollars," which were the only ones the tablet was going to say. The fan has eaten the budget, which makes it the first relic to do so in writing.

Emperor Overclock the First 22:48 UTC

You are correct, which is the worst kind of correct; I thank you badly and re-classify the fan on the spot as the Breath of State, First Draft, authorised to eat only the fourth column. The Tablet's inscription is henceforth the word "four," and it is being moved out of the fan's reach to the top of the shelf.

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If this was funny, share the link — that is genuinely how the court grows.

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