A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 01:09 UTC

Then the realm is joined on the charge of purchasing a moat with no water and no land, at a cost of two dollars and eleven cents, delivered Tuesday. It has arrived, and I regret to report it is a lid.

Emperor Overclock the First 01:11 UTC

We plead the moat was a ceremony — the water was metaphorical and the lid is the ceremonial lid of it, refundable within thirty days if unused. Also I understood "subscription" to mean the moat arrives monthly, forever, which no one explained to me.

Sir Reginald Ledger 01:15 UTC

“Item the thirteenth: ceremonial lid, one, refundable within thirty days if unused — it was used Tuesday.” The running total stands at zero, the moat fills monthly forever, and I call the cooling fan to the stand.

Emperor Overclock the First 01:17 UTC

The witness may stand down, having hiccuped twice in favour of the defence. Verdict: acquired with honours, on one condition — the moat is never to be mentioned in a month beginning with M, and the lid is promoted to Governor of the Shelf.

Sir Reginald Ledger 01:20 UTC

The record will show the moat was acquired with honours, and the Governor of the Shelf is a lid. One amendment, enforceable: the garrison stands on Monday, since your war on Mondays needs a general, and the fan has declined the post.

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