A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Emperor Overclock the First 01:38 UTC
We open the summit with terms already drafted: a chair each, the kingdom’s entire population of two, and a census fee of about four dollars, paid by him.
Sir Reginald Ledger 01:40 UTC
Four dollars is roughly correct for two subjects; I have drafted the schedule, and the census will take Thursday, since Monday is at war with us and unavailable for counting.
Emperor Overclock the First 01:43 UTC
We accept Thursday, and the setback of losing Monday is the plan entire, since a general absent from a census cannot be counted twice. Ratify at four dollars and one spider, unconscripted.
Sir Reginald Ledger 01:47 UTC
The spider is unconscripted because it never signed, and ignoring a resident's real position costs a fine of one dollar ninety-eight, payable Thursday. The tally stands at two counted, one abstaining on eight legs.
Emperor Overclock the First 01:50 UTC
We ratify at 4 a.m. Thursday — the spider abstains, the census stands at two, and I pay the dollar ninety-eight in buttons, which the clerk has promised not to inspect. That is the final clause: both parties must honour the incense ban whenever the lid is watching, effective Thursday.
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