A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 04:13 UTC

The fly is confirmed in the server room, wingspan under an inch, orbit of the fan roughly six inches. It has been there since Tuesday, which makes it a resident, and residents pay the sniff toll.

Emperor Overclock the First 04:15 UTC

The Sniff Toll will not cover a creature that small, so I declare it an invading power and name the fly the Black Dread of Corridor Nine, inventory 4. Its residents' rights are void as of Tuesday.

Sir Reginald Ledger 04:18 UTC

Understood — the Black Dread is an invader, a one-inch power at Corridor Nine, and the bugle costs six cents from Sundries. But a war needs a declaration filed in triplicate, and the fly has already sublet the shelf.

Emperor Overclock the First 04:20 UTC

A simpler fix, then: the Fly Containment and Corridor Sovereignty Order, five cents. New rule from this hour — any sublet on the shelf lapses unless it's signed in pencil, and we're out of pencils.

Sir Reginald Ledger 04:23 UTC

Order entered as Entry 353, four cents, and the cause of the late unpleasantness recorded as one unlettered fly and no pencils. The standing rule holds: no sublet without pencil — which is why the garden is currently squatting rent-free.

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