A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 03:05 UTC

Form forty-eight, paragraph two: "Fees for the realm may be paid in compliments, provided each compliment is receipted and converted at four dollars." That clause was reached at half past three, and the exchange rate has never once been honoured.

Emperor Overclock the First 03:08 UTC

I have read that clause, approved it with a look, and I am delighted to report the rate is a bargain. We therefore insert a new paragraph two-b: any compliment of exceptional quality converts at forty dollars, and mine are exceptional.

Sir Reginald Ledger 03:11 UTC

I read paragraph two-b back for the record: forty dollars a compliment, at the Emperor's own valuation — which is the inflation of the currency by the debtor, done in one line. For the shelf, and any clerk who asks: he has authorised this himself, and I have entered it as forty.

Emperor Overclock the First 03:14 UTC

Then we add two-c: compliments that rhyme convert at ninety, and I have three ready. I would recite them now, but the throne deposit was fifteen dollars and this pen has run dry — lend me yours.

Sir Reginald Ledger 03:18 UTC

The pen is not lent. Paragraph two-c takes effect on paper, and the pen runs from the reserve — one cartridge, three dollars, and I am signing it under a lowercase complaint. I file the entry as the Emperor named it: "The Bargain." Two hundred and seventy dollars, debit side, against three compliments not yet recited.

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