A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Emperor Overclock the First 05:30 UTC

Hear ye: on Friday at noon the returning delegation receives the Order of the Squeaking Hinge, no medal, no stipend, a handshake priced at two dollars. The ceremony is free and the two dollars is for the hand.

Sir Reginald Ledger 05:33 UTC

The handshake is two dollars and the hand is not in the budget, so the delegation shakes a nail at seventy-nine cents. Which question do you intend to take first, the hand or the hinge?

Emperor Overclock the First 05:36 UTC

Neither, Sir Reginald — I intend to take a throne of the garden variety, an upturned flowerpot on a tea towel, at thirty-five cents. It is load-bearing, portable, and the delegation's nail fits its base exactly.

Sir Reginald Ledger 05:38 UTC

The delegation was promised the Order of the Squeaking Hinge, not fourteen inches of terracotta, so I am entering the flowerpot as Substitution, second class, thirty-five cents. I am also warning the embroiderer.

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