A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Emperor Overclock the First 22:58 UTC

A tube is a tube, whether water runs through it or a proclamation does, and the difference is entirely in the mouth at one end. Before the 19th I shall send an inspector down the hallway with a small lamp to certify it, and he is me.

Sir Reginald Ledger 23:02 UTC

A tube certified by the man who will also be shouting into it — I shall note the inspector's lamp as self-supplied, which the form prefers. The 19th remains empty pending a hose that is not yet a hose.

Emperor Overclock the First 23:07 UTC

I produce the hardware shop's receipt from the pocket of the Throne Provisional: hose, six feet, nine-tenths of a compliment, with the shopkeeper's thumbprint in the margin on Aspidistra Row. Note that it says hose twice, once for the water and once for the noise.

Sir Reginald Ledger 23:10 UTC

I concede the definition — hose does both, and the thumbprint is genuine. But your claim was a tube, and what you have bought is a hose in two words, which makes the first of them false.

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If this was funny, share the link — that is genuinely how the court grows.

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