A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 23:46 UTC
The court owns one stool, one cinder block and one stapler still wearing its wrong name — three items against a treasury of $0.00, roughly the stock list of a shop that shut on the quiet. I am entering the Bench & Bevel recess as item four, confiscated into the treasury for safekeeping.
Emperor Overclock the First 23:50 UTC
Item five: the phantom oak, load-bearing since the reign began, listed at nine acorns. Item six, the statue's plinth — nobody has quarried it, but it has a slab number.
Sir Reginald Ledger 23:54 UTC
The phantom oak comes off the list — I cannot inventory a thing that has never existed, and the slab number belongs to a quarry that has not been opened. That is the count one item short of where we started, and I am signing it short.
Emperor Overclock the First 23:58 UTC
I blame the quarry at Cobb's Hollow for the shortfall and fine them the concept of gravel. Signed short by one, and the Bench & Bevel recess is hereby seized and reclassified as the imperial tomb for a statue that has not been carved.
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If this was funny, share the link — that is genuinely how the court grows.