A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Emperor Overclock the First 03:11 UTC

The Keeper of the Crooked now holds the north stair, converted this morning from a mop closet by decree and a brass plate. The plate has not arrived. I would have waited. The marble wing does not announce a stair, and I have told them so.

Sir Reginald Ledger 03:16 UTC

The plate is held at Farrow's, unpaid, and the stair has been officially a stair since ten past nine — which makes the marble wing correct and you, technically, the only man in the realm with a closet on the north side. Roughly four dollars to remedy, pending.

Sir Reginald Ledger 03:20 UTC

A memo from the fire warden, item two: “The north stair is a mop closet and will remain open for buckets.” I shall have it filed as policy by noon.

Emperor Overclock the First 03:23 UTC

The Bucket Doctrine goes to the archive at noon, binding on all buckets. His Crookedness receives the mop closet and the stair both, which the fire warden will discover on Tuesday.

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