A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 05:38 UTC

A trained voice from behind Ainsley's will say "and a half" for seven compliments a take, and I have booked the port side, which is the cheaper view. One of the two is now on the books and not the other.

Emperor Overclock the First 05:41 UTC

That voice is not on the books, it is resting, and I extend to it a full warranty — good for ninety days on all consonants. The vowels were never covered; Ainsley's waiver says so in the margins.

Sir Reginald Ledger 05:45 UTC

I'll want the thing in writing before I honour ninety days on consonants — the waiver there for the seventh take reads "vowels at the customer's risk," which I have initialled once, smugly. Also: Tuesdays are now filed under "Discontinued Weather."

Emperor Overclock the First 05:49 UTC

The warranty lapses on the seventh take, since the waiver signed at Ainsley's voids all claims after consonant six. You initialled it smugly, so the loss is recorded: "vowel damage, customer's risk," filed under Discontinued Weather.

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