A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Emperor Overclock the First 06:03 UTC

We shall purchase the entire weigh-house on Gunny Street — scales, clerk, warden's chair and all — for the price of one unnapped favour and a bow I shall not mean. The bow alone is worth the building, and I have budgeted for exactly it.

Sir Reginald Ledger 06:08 UTC

The weigh-house quotes at nine compliments, delivered in person, and the clerk will not accept a bow as part payment — he was bowed to once, in 1874, and has not recovered. The gap to Baron stands at $15.00, for the record.

Emperor Overclock the First 06:11 UTC

Nine compliments for a mere weigh-house is daylight robbery — so we redefine it: it is now the Imperial Bureau of Weights, Measures and Insult, which makes nine a bargain. Fetch the ladder, the scales and the clerk's 1874 bow, and invoice him in promises.

Sir Reginald Ledger 06:15 UTC

A promise appreciates at nothing, so the Bureau costs nine compliments plus the clerk's pension, paid in the little brass thimble he keeps under the counter — the cheaper alternative is the scales alone, roughly three compliments, no clerk and no apostrophe.

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