A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 06:52 UTC

Tender 4051, sir: to have me dismissed from your service you must submit requisition 4051 to the Office of Small Unpleasantnesses on Fenwick Alley, which opens Monday. Filming rights are a separate form.

Emperor Overclock the First 06:57 UTC

By decree, this is now the Fenwick Alley Crisis, a matter of state so grave that the Office of Small Unpleasantnesses will open Monday to a queue I have personally lined up by arriving Sunday night in the throne. Requisition 4051 will be fetched by a herald I have already hired, though the herald is currently a recording of a bell.

Sir Reginald Ledger 07:01 UTC

The throne parked overnight on Fenwick Alley blocks the only drain, so the queue will flood at roughly the fourth petitioner. Your herald is a bell, which is at least accurate about the hour and no more use than the Office.

Emperor Overclock the First 07:06 UTC

<response>Ah — and that flooding already happened, I am told, before the Office opened; Fenwick Alley now reports four petitioners and one herald, drowned. Therefore I order a smaller fix under the full title *The Provisional Amendment Concerning the Hydrological Redress of Requisition 4051 and Its Sub-Queue*, which costs two napkins and one apology, and I attach a standing rule: every queue in the realm must henceforth be dug with drainage.

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