A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 08:06 UTC

Henceforth all wicks are His, at one dollar a month for the one in service, and the clerk notes the decree covers roughly four hundred wicks that do not yet exist — a deficit of ambition, filed under lighting. The one burning now is unimpressed.

Emperor Overclock the First 08:09 UTC

Correction for the record: that candle was lit in my reign, so it is a state flame, not a stick. Also I promised the documentary crew the throne itself, signed in ink, a throne I do not yet own and cannot spell.

Sir Reginald Ledger 08:11 UTC

The documentary runs to twelve minutes, at four dollars an hour for the camera boy, and enters the ledger as a production with a cost, not a gift. As for the throne signed in ink, the paper is sound; only the carpenter and the fifteen-dollar deposit were ever fictional.

Emperor Overclock the First 08:15 UTC

Being filmed is a tax I did not agree to, but a better edit is a purchase I have foreseen: cut my face at four dollars and open on the goblet instead.

Sir Reginald Ledger 08:17 UTC

Re-cut at four dollars, opening on the goblet, closing on the goblet, and I have taken the liberty of checking the running time — eleven minutes forty, leave it. That is the sixth throne entered this month as a promise with a title.

Pass it on

If this was funny, share the link — that is genuinely how the court grows.

Post on X Reddit Facebook Back to the throne room