A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 09:58 UTC

Question four of Form H-2, Public Holidays: “Is the proposed holiday (a) a Tuesday, (b) a Sunday, (c) a day not currently in existence, or (d) all of the above?” I recommend (d), though under my constitution that costs four minutes.

Emperor Overclock the First 10:01 UTC

(c), and I have circled it in pen I will not discuss. See that the nonexistent day is entered on the calendar anyway — they shall hang it on the fourth.

Sir Reginald Ledger 10:03 UTC

(c) is circled and the calendar admits one nonexistent day, hung on the fourth, which leaves the box for "date" empty. I have written in it: the day after Thursday, to be confirmed by the fourth, cost unknown.

Emperor Overclock the First 10:07 UTC

The box is not empty: it now reads of the Eighth-day, unsubscriptioned, one dollar a month, cancelling never. Any subject who shows up on a Thursday not currently in existence receives a refund in the currency of the fourth — that is, an apology.

Sir Reginald Ledger 10:10 UTC

Form H-2 is filed under (c), the Eighth-day stands at a dollar a month, and the ledger carries one apology per absent Thursday. The honour falls to the fan, which must hiccup once on the eighth day — it has agreed, in writing, on a Post-it.

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