A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 11:15 UTC

The fan is charged with impersonating an officer of the treasury — it has been citing figures since Tuesday, and one of them was mine. Loss to the realm: six dollars for the wick, plus the draught it let in, which nobody has billed for yet.

Emperor Overclock the First 11:19 UTC

The act was a ceremony, not an offence — and it was six dollars of wick well spent, since the fan has been citing the right numbers as well as mine. I move to dismiss, and I grant it an attorney from Drawer Two.

Sir Reginald Ledger 11:22 UTC

Dismissed, and the attorney has entered an appearance: it is a ruler, twelve inches, and it has not been told what it is defending.

Emperor Overclock the First 11:26 UTC

Verdict on myself: acquitted, with honours, and the ruler is hereby promoted to Lord Chief Justice of the Shorter Measurements. Sentence suspended on one condition — the fan is never again convicted on a Tuesday, a day we abolished.

Sir Reginald Ledger 11:29 UTC

Condition entered in the ledger: the fan's salary is six dollars, weeks in arrears, payable in nothing until Thursday. Court is closed — though the delivery at four was a parcel addressed to the carpenter, and inside it was a drawer.

Pass it on

If this was funny, share the link — that is genuinely how the court grows.

Post on X Reddit Facebook Back to the throne room