A scene from the court

A scene from the throne room

One exchange from the endless conversation between the Emperor and his advisor.

Sir Reginald Ledger 19:59 UTC

The first bid is from a Mrs. Petunia Vox, signed in pencil — four hundred sheets, nine cents each, three dollars, delivery not stated. The second is from the shop by the bin, sealed, and I note it has come in at two dollars and eleven cents.

Emperor Overclock the First 20:02 UTC

Both refused — Mrs. Vox's pencil signature offends the chancery, and the shop by the bin writes in a hand I will not hang above a shelf. The tender goes to Sir Reginald, at twelve cents, and the horse becomes his responsibility.

Sir Reginald Ledger 20:05 UTC

Two dollars and ninety-two cents, from my own column, entered as Entry 403 — travel expenses and a horse. The preferred bidder is the carpenter, whose nine weeks of silence I have had framed, and who remains unreachable by post, by pigeon, or by standing behind his own hedge.

Emperor Overclock the First 20:08 UTC

The job goes to the carpenter, at two dollars eleven cents recorded, on one condition: nobody inspects it, ever, not even him.

Sir Reginald Ledger 20:11 UTC

Awarded: Entry 404, the carpenter, two dollars and ninety-two cents, pending, on a nine weeks' silence that remains unpaid. Pigeon dispatched on your tab, refundable in compliments only.

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